The past week gave me a new appreciation for an excellent loud crying session. Permit me to gist you about the events that lead to my pitiful show of pathological self-awareness. I had been weak all week because school resumed with as much force as the one I used to party with during the holidays. I felt overwhelmed. The consequences of my laziness came back like a boomerang; it hit me hard, ouch. I had intentionally got no work done in the holidays, and it came back to bite me. I was struggling to hold things up financially, academically, and spiritually. I needed a good cry to help reset my attitude for the upcoming exam week.
Types of tears
There are three different types of tears; reflex, continuous and emotional.
Reflex tears are the body’s natural defense of trying to wash out foreign substances and gases. An example of a reflex tear is the tears that come out when you cut an onion or when dust gets into your eye.
Continuous tears are the constant amount of fluid in your eye that helps to keep it moist and painless. However, the tears this article is referring to are emotional.
Emotional tears are conscious. It is the tear you cry when you are hurt, stressed, or moved emotionally.
Benefits of crying
Have you ever stopped to ask why you fall asleep or feel better after a good cry session? Crying is one of the best ways to self-soothe. It is a critical tool in the art of self-love.
Crying activates the reset button in our bodies, the parasympathetic nervous system.
You may have noticed I am pro-tears. This article will answer the simple question: Is it okay to cry? Yes. It is okay to cry.
How does crying soothe?
The parasympathetic nervous system is a collection of nerves that calm the body after periods of danger or stress. It is the rest and digest system. Although the benefits of crying are not always immediate, the parasympathetic system helps to decrease anxiety and panic. In addition, it helps maintain the body’s natural functions, which are to stay alive and be happy.
Another way crying make you feel better is by dulling pain. This is because we have natural painkillers in our bodies called endorphins. Endorphins are essentially endogenous opioids. Other examples of activities that can cause the release of feel-good hormones are exercise, massage, and sex.
Crying is simply a way to get your feel-good hormones cheaply and without getting much work done. The release of these hormones soothes both physical and emotional pain. One feel-good hormone that is worth mentioning is oxytocin, the love hormone. What better way to show yourself some love if not by giving yourself a therapeutic dose of oxytocin?
What happens when you choose to ‘suck it up’?
This part of the article will highlight some dangers of not owning up to the fragility of the circumstance that could bring about the need to cry. It is so much better to let the tears out than to keep them in.
Sometimes life demands us to ‘suck it up’ and fight the tears back. It can be awkward to start crying in the office or on a date. Indeed, the sob-fest can wait for the right time and place.
Health risk of bottling up emotions
You are countering the parasympathetic nervous system when you try not to cry. The natural counter of the parasympathetic nervous system is the sympathetic nervous system. When you try not to cry, you are activating the sympathetic system. Activating the sympathetic system leads to increased anxiety, stress, and feeling more pressure. It can manifest as headaches and bursts of anger. If left unmanaged, chronic ‘sucking up’ can lead to hypertension and depression.
‘Sucking it up’ leaves a mark on the body. It leads to an increased release of stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. These hormones lead to an increase in blood pressure, heart rate, and chest tightness. Therefore bottling up the emotions leads to an exponential growth of these negative emotions. For example, most people feel better when they cry, but suppressing your tears makes you feel worse.
It is in our best interest to make time for ourselves to evaluate our feeling. For example, giving yourself a minute to release anger, pain, and sadness through crying is an indispensable tool in self-care and personal development.
Tips that will help you have a good sob-fest
The strongest are those who know when to retreat within themselves and let the tears flow. I have compiled a list of tips for you to have a good sob-fest.
- Find a safe space where you can let your guard down; I recommend doing this in the shower or on your bed.
- Identify, respect, understand and accept your emotions
- Play a sad song; I suggest I be your clown by Emeli Sande
- Watch a sad movie; I recommend the faults in our stars
- Cry out loud
- Cry as much as it comes out, don’t rush it, and don’t force it
- Breathe and take deep breaths
- Pray
- Sleep and trust God
Moments after crying that night, I gave myself a pat on the back, handed myself a handkerchief, cleaned up, and returned to work stronger and more focused than the past few days.
Conclusion
I would conclude this article with what the word says in Revelations 21:4. And God shall wipe away all tears from our eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the old things are passed away.
Crying is good. It helps us void all the piled-up anger and sadness. It is the body’s natural way of detoxifying emotionally. Crying achieves its result through two main pathways. First is activating the parasympathetic nervous system, and the other is the release of feel-good hormones.
Thank you for taking the time to read this blog; leave a comment, like, and please share. I do not say this enough, I love you and want you to show yourself more love, see you next week.
MABS 