Written by Jametta Anietie Ukpong

Suicide is a serious public health concern that affects individuals, families, churches, workplaces, and entire communities. When a person dies by suicide, the effects extend far beyond the individual, leaving family members, friends, colleagues, and communities to cope with grief, unanswered questions, and often a profound sense of loss.

But suicide is preventable.

Recognizing warning signs, knowing how to respond, creating supportive environments, and helping people access appropriate care can make a meaningful difference.

I remember one Sunday during a church service when the usual flow of the service was paused because a member watching online commented that they were feeling depressed and wished they could end their life. At that very moment, the church did not ignore the message or continue with the service as usual. The congregation was informed, and everyone was encouraged to pray for the individual, asking God to strengthen, comfort, and preserve their life.

This experience reminded me that suicide prevention can begin with simply paying attention and taking someone’s words seriously.

For Christian communities, suicide prevention also means creating safe spaces where people can speak honestly about their struggles without fear of judgment or shame. It means reminding people that they are loved, valued, and not alone, while also encouraging them to seek appropriate professional and pastoral support when needed.

What Is Suicide?

Suicide refers to death caused by intentional self-directed actions with the intention of ending one’s life.

It is important to understand that suicide does not have one single cause. People may experience suicidal thoughts or behaviors for many different and often overlapping reasons, including depression and other mental health conditions, trauma, loss, relationship difficulties, financial or social stress, chronic pain, substance use, feelings of isolation, or overwhelming circumstances.

Hopelessness and unbearable emotional pain can be important risk factors, but they do not explain every suicide.

A person experiencing suicidal thoughts may feel that their circumstances will never improve or that death is the only way to escape their suffering. This is why compassionate intervention matters. A suicidal crisis can change, and people can recover with appropriate support and treatment.

Understanding Suicide: What Increases Risk?

Suicide risk can increase when several difficult circumstances occur at the same time.

Some risk factors include:

• Depression and other mental health conditions
• Previous suicide attempts or suicidal behavior
• Substance or alcohol misuse
• Experiences of trauma or abuse
• Major relationship problems or loss
• Social isolation or loneliness
• Financial or employment difficulties
• Chronic physical pain or serious illness
• Exposure to another person’s suicide
• Feelings of hopelessness, shame, or being trapped
• Access to lethal means

Having one or more of these factors does not mean that someone will attempt suicide. Risk should be understood in the context of the person’s circumstances, behavior, and current mental state.

Warning Signs of Suicide

Sometimes a person may directly tell you that they are thinking about suicide. Other times, changes in their words, behavior, or mood may indicate that they are struggling.

1. Talking About Suicide or Death

Take statements about suicide seriously, even if they are made casually or indirectly.

Examples include talking about:

• Killing themselves
• Wanting to die
• Having no reason to live
• Feeling like a burden to others
• Feeling trapped
• Experiencing unbearable emotional or physical pain
• Believing that things will never get better
• Saying that other people would be better off without them

2. Changes in Behavior

Possible behavioral warning signs include:

• Looking for ways to die or researching suicide
• Increased alcohol or drug use
• Acting recklessly or taking unusual risks
• Withdrawing from activities they previously enjoyed
• Isolating themselves from family and friends
• Significant changes in sleeping patterns
• Giving away important possessions
• Saying goodbye to people in an unusual or final-sounding way
• Sudden changes in behavior after a period of severe distress

A sudden improvement in mood after a period of intense suicidal distress should also be taken seriously, particularly if other warning signs are present.

3. Changes in Mood

Mood changes can include:

• Depression or persistent sadness
• Loss of interest or pleasure
• Anxiety
• Irritability
• Anger or rage
• Feelings of humiliation or shame
• Severe emotional distress
• Feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness

Not everyone who experiences these symptoms is suicidal. However, significant changes—especially when several occur together—deserve attention.

Don’t Ignore the Signs

One of the most important principles of suicide prevention is taking warning signs seriously.

You do not need to be a mental health professional to ask someone whether they are thinking about suicide.

In fact, asking directly can open the door to a conversation that might otherwise never happen.

You will not “put the idea” of suicide into someone’s mind simply by asking about it. A direct, calm, compassionate question can help someone feel seen and give them an opportunity to talk about what they are experiencing.

How to Start a Conversation About Suicide

You do not need perfect words.

You can begin with something simple:

“I’ve really been feeling concerned about you lately.”

“I’ve noticed some differences in you recently, and I’m wondering how you’re doing.”

“You haven’t seemed like yourself lately, and I wanted to check in.”

If you are concerned that someone may be suicidal, you can ask directly:

“Are you thinking about suicide?”

Or:

“Have you been thinking about killing yourself?”

If they say yes, don’t panic. Stay calm and continue listening.

You can ask:

• “When did you begin feeling this way?”
• “Did something happen that made you start feeling this way?”
• “Have you thought about how you would hurt yourself?”
• “Are you in immediate danger right now?”
• “Is there anything I can do to help you stay safe?”
• “Who else can we involve to support you?”

If there is immediate danger, do not leave the person alone. Help them connect with emergency or professional support and, when appropriate, reduce access to lethal means.

What To Do When Someone Tells You They Are Suicidal

DO:

1. Be present.
Let the person know that you care and that they do not have to face the situation alone.

2. Listen.
Give them room to express what they are experiencing without immediately trying to fix everything.

3. Stay calm.
Your reaction can influence whether they feel safe enough to continue talking.

4. Be compassionate and non-judgmental.
You may not fully understand their experience, but you can still acknowledge their pain.

5. Take them seriously.
Never assume that someone is “just seeking attention.”

6. Encourage professional help.
A doctor, psychologist, psychiatrist, counselor, crisis service, or emergency department can provide appropriate support.

7. Involve trusted people.
If someone’s life may be in danger, protecting their safety takes priority over keeping their suicidal thoughts secret.

8. Help create immediate safety.
If there is imminent risk, stay with the person and seek emergency assistance.

DON’T:

1. Don’t argue with their feelings.

Avoid responses such as, “You have so much to live for,” as a way of shutting down the conversation.

2. Don’t shame them.

Avoid telling them that they are weak, selfish, ungrateful, or disappointing God.

3. Don’t lecture them.

A person in crisis needs connection and safety before a long lecture.

4. Don’t dismiss their pain.

Statements such as “Other people have it worse” can make someone feel even more alone.

5. Don’t promise secrecy.

If someone’s life is at risk, you may need to tell a trusted person or professional who can help keep them safe.

6. Don’t leave someone alone when there is immediate danger.

Seek urgent professional or emergency assistance instead.

Suicide Prevention

Prevention also means building protective factors before a crisis occurs.

Protective factors can include:

• Access to appropriate mental health care
• Early treatment of mental health difficulties
• Strong relationships with family and friends
• Connection to supportive communities
• Healthy problem-solving and coping skills
• A sense of purpose and belonging
• Safe and supportive faith communities
• Cultural or religious beliefs that encourage help-seeking and connection
• Reducing access to lethal means when someone is at risk
• Developing healthy ways to manage stress and emotional pain

A person does not have to wait until they are suicidal before seeking help.

Choosing Hope in the Middle of Pain

For Christians, suicide prevention is not simply about telling someone to “pray harder” or quoting Scripture at them.

Faith and professional mental health care do not have to compete with one another. Joyce Meyer has often spoken about the importance of seeking help and not being ashamed to admit when you’re struggling.

Seeking help does not make you a weak Christian.

You can have faith in God and still need support. You can pray and still talk to a counselor. You can trust God and still ask someone to walk with you through a difficult season.

Asking for help is not a failure of faith. Sometimes, God answers our prayers through the people He places around us.

Prayer, Scripture, pastoral support, Christian community, counseling, medical care, and other appropriate forms of support can work together.

The Bible also gives us examples of people who experienced profound emotional distress.

Elijah Wanted to Die

In 1 Kings 19:1–18, Elijah became exhausted, afraid, and deeply discouraged. He reached a point where he asked God to take his life.

Notice God’s response.

God did not shame Elijah for being overwhelmed.

Elijah was given rest, food, God’s presence, and renewed direction.

Moses Became Overwhelmed

In Numbers 11:10–17, Moses became so overwhelmed by the burden he was carrying that he expressed a desire for his life to end.

God responded by providing help and people to share the responsibility.

This reminds us that we were never designed to carry every burden alone.

Job Experienced Deep Despair

Job expressed profound despair throughout the book of Job, including in Job 3, Job 6:8–13, and Job 30:20–23.

Yet Job’s suffering was not the end of his story.

His experience reminds us that a person’s darkest chapter does not necessarily determine how their story ends.

Bible Verses to Hold Onto When Life Feels Too Painful

When you feel broken or overwhelmed

• Psalm 34:17–18 — God is near to the brokenhearted and those crushed in spirit.
• Psalm 42:5 — Speaking hope to your own soul when you feel downcast.
• Psalm 55:22 — Giving your burdens to God and trusting Him to sustain you.
• Psalm 61:1–2 — Crying out to God when your heart is overwhelmed.
• Psalm 73:26 — God remains your strength even when your heart and body fail.
• Psalm 147:3 — God heals the brokenhearted.
• Isaiah 41:10 — God promises His presence, strength, help, and support.
• Isaiah 43:1–2 — God promises to be with His people through overwhelming circumstances.

When you feel like there is no hope

• Lamentations 3:21–24 — Remembering God’s faithfulness when circumstances feel hopeless.
• Romans 5:3–5 — Suffering can produce perseverance, character, and hope.
• Romans 8:18 — Present suffering is not the end of the story.
• Romans 8:28 — God can work through circumstances for the good of those who love Him.
• Romans 8:31–32 — God is for His people.
• Romans 8:35–39 — Nothing can separate believers from the love of God in Christ.
• 2 Corinthians 4:8–9 — Being pressured and struck down does not mean being destroyed.
• 2 Corinthians 4:16–18 — Present suffering is not the entirety of our reality.

Your life has value

• Genesis 1:26–27 — Humanity is created in God’s image.
• Psalm 139:13–18 — God knows and formed us intimately.
• 1 Corinthians 6:19–20 — Our bodies belong to God.
• Acts 17:25–28 — God gives life and breath.
• Ephesians 2:10 — We are God’s workmanship, created for good works.

When you are going through a crisis

• 1 Corinthians 10:13 — God provides a way through temptation and testing.
• James 1:2–4 — Trials can produce endurance.
• Hebrews 4:15–16 — We can approach God for mercy and help.
• Philippians 4:6–7 — Bring anxiety and distress to God and seek His peace.
• 1 Peter 5:7 — Give your worries to God because He cares for you.

If You Are Thinking About Suicide Right Now

Please do not face the moment alone.

Move away from anything you could use to hurt yourself and get around another person. Tell someone you trust exactly what is happening.

You can say:

“I am thinking about suicide, and I don’t feel safe being alone right now. Please stay with me and help me get support.”

If you believe you may act on suicidal thoughts or have already harmed yourself, seek emergency medical help immediately.

You do not need to solve your entire life today. The feelings you are experiencing may be intense, but feelings can change. Circumstances can change. Treatment can help. People can help. God can meet you in places of profound pain.